I loved you so much. You might have been my little girl. You were my favorite "guinea pig" whenever I picked up a new lens for my camera. I had so much I still wanted to do with you, but your life was too short and far too difficult in the past few months.

I've never made this kind of decision, and I pray that I never will have to again. When I held you before signing off that paperwork, I realized how fragile your life was. You had that IV and you showed so much excitement at first, and that was what I wanted to see more than anything.

I saw your little stubwaggle when Julie came into the room and my heart sang! You were suddenly being the little girl I knew and loved. I had hope that you could beat this terrible illness and come back to us.

But while you were strong, I fear that it was stronger. And I'm sorry to have let you suffered under its grasp for so long.

But this way, you will be up in Heaven with Bitsy- your friend that you came to love and help us endure through her illness. You'll be able to run up and down the stairs and eat all the leftovers dropped from the stove to your heart's content. You will once again have that bell-in-a-tennis-ball that I was unable to replace. As Melissa said, you can keep God up with your snoring, but I'm sure He won't mind.

You will, again, be happy. And you will be without pain.

And for that, I am greatful.

I await the day when you can curl up next to me again.

Until then, find that FAVORITE couch of yours and squirm and squirm until you have claimed it. Just remember to save us a spot on it, please.

With all of my love,
Kirsy


(x-posted to my livejournal)